"I’m
usually attracted to people who are in change and people who are
growing and really searching and learning about themselves, so
the women that I’ve been in love with have been like that
- in change. As well, I’m afraid to commit to relationships
with women, so most of the committed relationships have been with
men."
"The
men that I’ve been in love with, it’s been quite sexual,
whereas with the women it’s been a lot more gradual and slow,
it’s almost deeper with women because it’s not so sexually
based."
"I am
generally attracted to people who’ve come from an incredibly
dysfunctional background - as dysfunctional as my own. Unfortunately,
that has led to problems, because I’ve been attracted to
people who don’t want to work through that now."
"I think
it’s really interesting to watch men fluctuate between wanting
to be like a sensitive guy and a macho guy. I think that’s
really beautiful and really interesting and it’s really interesting
to me as well…I really pride myself on being independent
- the fact that I’ve created my own record label and stuff
like that - but at the same time, it’s like part of me wants
to have some man just take care of me, and I think a lot of people
experience that."
I’m used
to being in bad relationships and I’m used to being in a
stressful, emotional environment."
"Sex
does play a large part, especially in my present relationship.
I’m finally getting comfortable with my body, so I’m
finally starting to enjoy sex more and more as I grow older….I
would like it not to play such a large role, because I find that
I don’t like the idea of defining the relationship by sex
- in other words, ‘you are my sex partner and you are mine
and you are in my relationship, because we are sex partners. I
would like the relationship to grow outward. I would like to be
in a relationship that is broader, and not just defined as ‘there’s
a connection between you and me because we fuck.’"
"You
meet someone, the sex is great and everything is peachy, then
because things seem to be not so sexually motivated in terms of
relationships, it’s like the sex dies, well OK the relationship
is over. That seems to be a lot of the problem especially that
I hear people talking about."
"I think,
looking at the way my parents were and seeing the amount of crap
they gave each other and stayed with makes me very nervous about
staying with someone because I am afraid that I’m going to
be like that to somebody."
"My partner
now, he does things that I would have freaked out at years ago
when I was in a real hardcore feminist stage, which now I really
like, which is a traditional role that a man would do, like helping
me get my coat on. I think that’s beautiful, that’s
really respectful."
"What
do I need from him? I don’t know, there’s no clear definition
anymore. I certainly don’t want him to be the breadwinner,
and I don’t want to stay at home making babies kind of thing."
"I think
that the fundamental difference between now and other generations,
and intimacy between people now is that people seem to have a
lack of ability to commit to anything in this generation - and
I think that totally reflects on relationships. I see very few
relationships lasting beyond 3 years, 1 year, whatever it is.
A lot of relationships come to a certain peak and then they just
don’t go past it anymore. It can be kind of depressing to
observe, and observe in myself as well."
"We
have way more options - birth control, whether we want to get
married, who we want to marry…just, there’s more options.
It’s totally confusing, basically."
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